Eggzilla! And A New Web Fave

I first saw the Hungry Girl, Lisa Lillien, on the Rachel Ray show. She's a real foodie, and had these amazing tips and tricks on ways to save calories and fat on the show, so I couldn't wait to check out her website. The other day, I decided to sign up for her daily emails and am loving them. I learned to make these egg scrambles in a mug in the microwave using egg substitute and low fat veggies and meats (very low fat...as opposed to my other mug creation that was a total diet buster! see it here).

I used some leftover green onion, cilantro and avocado from last nights chili, and added some salsa to the eggs. In the microwave, it began to grow and grow and sort of turned into an "eggzilla" for minute there!


But after just a couple of minutes, it was done...all in the cup! I decided to warm up a tortilla and added the egg mixture and a little more salsa for a breakfast burrito. I even had over half of the egg mixture left, so I can eat it again tomorrow. It was very filling, despite being so low in calories, that I wasn't even hungry again until the late afternoon.

Check out hungrygirl.com and sign up for her free daily emails and tips and tricks. I think you'll be glad you did.

Struggling

Just wanted to let you know that I'm really struggling with the eating thing. I'm not even remotely trying to control it or change anything about it. It's getting worse actually. I'm not surprised by this. It happens every time. I try to change just a little and do better and I take 100 steps backward. I had lost a few pounds (from the stomach flu) and kept them off for about a month, but have gained back everything and am back where I was when I started this blog on January one. This is a pic of me out to dinner with my hubby on Feb. 14th, Valentines Day (rockin' the pink sweater and pearls again!)


I was hoping to have lost some weight before the spring. We were going to FINALLY have a family portrait made. Can you believe my husband and I have not had our picture made together since we were engaged back in 1996? And we haven't had a picture made together with our baby yet either? The sad truth is, it's all because I don't want to be photographed this fat! I know that sounds ridiculous. I mean, my daughter deserves to see her family together in pictures when she's older. It's just another part of the whole, "not living" thing. Not getting out there, not being present, not fully enjoying life...hiding all the time. But again, that's why I'm doing this blog. To get real, to put it out there and finally shed some light on all this darkness once and for all. I just need your prayers right now guys. I'm really struggling and feel defeated in this area. Your prayers are much appreciated and valued!

Now, on the upside, I am enjoying moving and exercising. Maybe it's because the weather has just been so gloomy lately that it feels good to get my blood flowing! Today it was a little sunny for the first time in many weeks and I wanted to go for a walk so bad, but of course, there's the baby factor. There's still no way I'm getting her out in 30 degree weather. But working out at home is proving fun until it gets warm outside.

I'm also proud of some of the strides I've made in my housekeeping. I've been doing some productive things very consistently that have made a difference in my home, like picking up around the house every time I'm up, even if it's just one toy or throwing away a little trash, it's helping. And I also got my room cleaned up, boxes unpacked and put away and have been making the bed every day. It looks really pretty in there! At my old house, the bedroom stayed "unfinished" for 6 years. It was a shame because we had a nice bedroom. I vowed that I would put some effort into making our bedroom comfortable and inviting AND CLUTTER FREE in this new house. And I've done it! It feels good. And I think my husband appreciates that it's calming when he comes in from work and gets undressed in there. I've even noticed that instead of draping his clothes over the stationary bike (which I removed) or over the dresser mirror, he is putting them away. Does anyone else's hubby do that? So, I'm doing some things that I'm proud of and it's not all bad.

Snap, Crackle, Pop!

My new workout video!

I recently bought a new exercise video online, Denise Austin's "Burn Fat Fast Cardio Blast," which consists of 4, 10 minute cardio workouts, a warm up and a cool down. I bought this video because I loved that it included a "Retro Aerobic" routine with classic moves like grapevines, ponies and heel jacks. I know, because I used to do these exact same moves with Denise back in the day when she had a daily workout show on ESPN. I've always loved the way Denise eases you into her workouts with encouragement and reassurance. I hate those trainers that try to kick your butt right out of the gate!

Anyway, I watched the first couple of workouts (while I was sitting in the floor folding clothes) that included kick boxing and athletic interval training. Those looked a little difficult. Then I watched the retro aerobics which looked like so much fun! Just what I remembered. And then I decided to put away the clothes and jump in and do the last workout which was cardio dance moves. There were a lot of Latin salsa and mambo moves and hip shaking. It was fun! But I couldn't believe that I was sweating so much after only 10 minutes!

I continued with the cool down (which I always look forward to) and then it happened. The snaps, the crackles, and the pops! When I twisted to stretch, my back and hips POPPED. When I went to stretch my leg muscles in a lunge, my knees CRACKLED. And when I went to stretch my neck and back, it they felt like they would SNAP they were so tight! Boy am I out of shape! How do I know? My body told me so! : )

But you know what? It feels soooo good to move my body. To experience a greater range of motion than just what it takes to accomplish my daily activites. To stretch and bend and dance...it feels great! Now, do I like sweating? NO! Do I like getting out of breath? NO! Do I like having my face turn as red as a beet? NO! Do I enjoy being sore the next day? NO WAY! But, do I like being able to walk up a set of steps in public without one or all of the former occuring? YES!!!!

See, that's my point. When you're seriously overweight, even taking a flight of stairs feels like a 30 minute aerobic workout! That's why this weight has to come off. I can't imagine being 35, 40, 50, (and if I make it) even 60, still struggling with this. What kind of life is that? One of regret, full of woulda, shoulda, couldas? Nothing seems worse to me than a life lived with regret. Is it really a life LIVED?

Coffee...My Alternative to the Gym!

This morning (Saturday), we were all up at the same time (rare). My husband had to go into work for a little while, and was getting ready, etc. So, I decided to make him a cup of coffee (very appreciated...it's the little things, ya know), and I had some myself. Now, I don't know if I've mentioned this, but I don't drink coffee very often, for this one reason...IT MAKES ME SWEAT LIKE CRAZY! And this morning was no exception. And this wasn't even strong coffee. As a matter of fact, my coffee is more like milk with little splash of coffee. But for some reason, coffee makes me very hot (you're asking, "How could you get much hotter?" joke!) and makes me sweat. So much so, I had to take a shower just after just 2 cups of my milk/coffee concoction!

I've always had this problem. The few times I've drank alcohol, I've had the same reaction. I'm just wondering why? I did a little reading online before I sat down to write this, and didn't find anything that satisfied my question. I mean, I get that there's caffeine in coffee and that revs up your metabolism, but so does Coke. And it doesn't make me sweat...and I drink a LOT of Coke. I also understand that it's hot (duh), but so is hot tea and hot chocolate, and those don't make me sweat either. So, I'm at a loss.

The only silver lining I can come up with is that if coffee makes me work up a sweat, then maybe I should drink it instead of working out! I seem to be getting the same result! That makes sense, right? I didn't think you'd agree.

Great Day in the Mornin'!

What is it about getting a good start early in the morning that puts you in the mood to be more productive?

Oh, and if you've never heard the saying that I used for my title, I guess all I can say it's a thing I've heard all my life down here in the South. You say it when you're surprised or in shock or are making some sort of exclamation! For example, "Great day in the mornin! Angie got up before noon!" LOL

This morning I got up with this thought on my mind "...today is the only day I have, so I want to make good choices for today only!" So, I got up before the baby (I usually sleep until she gets up) and went into the living room and turned on an exercise program from "On Demand." I did a few minutes of yoga stretching and a few minutes of kick boxing. In all, I could only do about 10 minutes before I was huffing and puffing and hurting. But something is better than nothing, right? Well, because I was sweaty from just that 10 minutes, I hopped in the shower...and even shaved my legs! Now that's saying something (you ladies know what I'm talking about...that gets neglected during the winter months! LOL)! Now, me taking a shower first thing in the morning is REALLY odd! But I was on a roll!

Well, by then, the baby had woken up, so I got her up and changed and immediately went into the kitchen to make her breakfast. I usually plop down on the couch with her and get on the computer immediately while she watches a cartoon. But I didn't today. I made her breakfast and then straightened up a little in the kitchen. While in there, I realized that my husband had not taken out the 3 bags of trash I put out for him for trash day...which meant he didn't haul the container to the curb! Arghh! So, after I fed the baby her blueberry waffle, I got dressed (in matching clothes), put on some tennis shoes and hauled out the trash to the curb in about 3 inches of snow while it was raining! Yeah...fun.

So, I came in, and THEN plopped down on the couch for some computer time. I just updated my fb status, checked some emails and approved some blog comments, which all took about 15 minutes, then I was off.

I decided that I was hungry, so I made myself a good breakfast. And not just the usual Capt. Crunch that I usually make. I had some leftover sausage links from the weekend's breakfast, and some tortillas, so I decided to make breakfast burritos. So, I chopped some onion, green pepper and cut up the leftover sausage and sauteed those in a pan. Then added a couple of beaten eggs. I rolled all that up in two warmed tortillas, added some salsa and sour cream and had a very nice, filling breakfast! I looked up at the clock and it was only 10:00am!

I couldn't believe I had done all that and it was not even close to noon! No wonder my grandmother (who is my homemaking hero) would always plop down in her favorite chair with a nice cup of coffee at 11:00am to watch the Price is Right, she had been up since 6am, cleaning and getting things done around the house and needed a much deserved break! Then, from 1-4pm, she watches her "stories," and is back up after that to get dinner started and piddle around on whatever else she can find to do! She's amazing!

So I guess I shouldn't feel so guilty about the time I spend on the computer in the afternoon when the baby is asleep. But the difference between my grandmother and me, is that she gets up early, works quickly and efficiently and gets a lot done before noon. And I get up late, do nothing all morning, and still want time for "myself" in the afternoon. But today was different! I did get a lot done this morning and feel very at peace with taking a few minutes for myself.

So I ask again...what is it about getting a good, early start that just sets us up for success for the day? I know God told us to...I guess He knows the answer to that question, so I should ask Him, right?

An Acceptable Beverage

I'll never forget a light bulb moment I had many years ago, back in 1998, during my first year as a Head Start teacher. I remember sitting through hours and hours of boring trainings (and continued to sit through those same trainings for 4 years...blah) and not really looking forward to the one on their food and nutrition program. But the guy who was in charge of it said something during his shpeel, that has stuck with me these many years. He talked about cutting back on juices and milk and teaching the kids to drink water as an acceptable beverage. A what? Water is a what? What a concept...drinking water in place of other beverages because it's just as acceptable. Hmmm? What a concept! Going to a restaurant and having a glass of water with your meal because it's acceptable, having a glass of water when you're thirsty as opposed to a big bottle of Coke, or glass of juice, because it's acceptable! Wow!

As a child we NEVER had water as a beverage choice with our meals. Sure, it was always right there in the tap, but no one drank water for water's sake. It was always used for making coffee (which my parents drink all day), making a pitcher of Kool-Aid or lemonade, or we just drank soda. So, I never learned this concept either! Now as an adult, it's like the water has to be special before I'll drink it. It has to be in a plastic bottle and also has to be certain brands (Dasani is my fave) before I think it's "acceptable" to drink. But that's just silly and a little pretentious. Isn't it?

So anyway, as I'm trying to cut back on the Cokes, this light bulb moment came to my remembrance and shook me again. I can have water as an acceptable beverage with any meal, any time, and it's not weird! As a matter of fact, I had some this evening after eating an apple for a snack. I just didn't want a Coke after eating that nice tart apple. I wanted WATER! So, I went in the kitchen, put some ice in a glass and turned on the tap. It was perfect! Acceptable! And I'm going to do it more often!

I Hardly Even Had Time to CLIMB Onto the Wagon...

....before I miserably fell off! Today has been a horrible food day for me. I haven't had one of these ALL DAY binges in a LONG time! And I just posted hardly 24 hours ago that I was going to get this eating under control this month. Ughh! Frustrating!

But I will say this...I am truly an emotional eater! I've been dealing with a lot lately, and I think it's getting to me. Is it because my husband is mad at me right now? Is it because I started a new business and am scared of failing? Is it because I'm trying to whip my flesh into submission and it (I) doesn't like it one bit? Is it because this is the 4th day in a row that I haven't done the dishes? Maybe it's those unpleasant visions and dreams of the past that constantly fill my mind. Is it that I just feel totally guilty and disappointed in myself for being less than I know I can be? And on top of all this...I feel like a big, fat baby for whining. There are a lot of people out there who have bigger problems than I have. I shouldn't be complaining, or drowning my self-indulgent sorrow in guacamole! Get a grip and get some perspective Angie!

Well, on the bright side...it's only Feb. 3rd, right? I've got the whole month to make up for this blunder of a bad day. Ughh! But do you know what sucks? February's the shortest month of the year! I have a less than 3 weeks to get it together! But get it together I must!!! I feel like I'm going crazy ya'll!

Prayer...need lots of prayer....and a lock on the fridge!

New Month, New Start

I've been reflecting the past few days on what changes I've made over the course of this first month in my efforts to really change my life. I must say that I'm encouraged. I'm not quite "proud" of myself, but will acknowledge that I've made some progress.

The thing I'm most happy with is the fact that I'm "aware." It feels good to actually be conscious during the day! One of the problems with being a sahmbie, is that you feel like you're in a fog all the time. One day drags into the next and that day turns into a week and then a month. And you've felt like you've had cobwebs on your eyes the whole time because everything is a mess...your home, your body, your children, your life and you're not sure why or how you ended up there. You were present, but not aware or conscious of what chaos was going on around you. It doesn't even enter your mind some days that you need to brush your teeth. And a whole day will go by and you'll realize that you're still in your pajamas or that except to go to the bathroom and feed your child, you were planted in the same spot on the couch ALL DAY! The biggest change in me is that I'm aware of this now. My eyes are opened, my head is clear and I my resolve is strong.

I can say after this first month that I am getting dressed, brushing my teeth, taking a shower and keeping things picked up a little better around the house. I've developed some good habits and that feels good.

I also started a new business that is giving me some purpose and something to be proud of. I log onto the computer to complete trainings, am doing a lot of reading and am talking to people during the day about more than just mommy and baby stuff. That feels good too!

But during this reflection, I've seen some things that I don't like. I'm still in sort of a zombie state when it comes to my eating and I want to get out of this. I don't give hardly a thought to what I'm eating throughout the day. If you keep up with my food journal, you would see that I eat a little of this and a little of that (or a lot). A great deal of it is junk food and sodas. I am, I will admit, addicted to Coke. I try to drink Diet Coke, but it just makes me soooo thirsty! Regular Coke quenches my thirst and gives me that big shot of caffeine that I need. I truly love them, but know they are not good for me. I'm just acknowledging this right now. I'm not going to say that I'm giving them up or am even going to try to give them up. I'm just recognizing that it's an issue of mine that needs to be looked at.

So if January was the month that I had some improvements in the areas of personal hygiene and personal appearance, February is going to be the month I look at and try to work on my eating. I'm tired of eating like a 4 year old. A few goldfish crackers here, a chicken nugget there, a swig of apple juice here, a bowl of cereal there. It's sad that a 34 year old would eat this way. Again, it's about requiring more of yourself. I'm going to try, starting with my grocery store trip tomorrow. I'm making my list tonight and will try to buy some healthy (adult) foods for once instead of always concentrating on buying for the baby. She will benefit from healthy fruits and veggies in the house too!

Alright! This post made up for the neglect I've been giving this blog lately...it was a doozie! I doubt any of you read the WHOLE thing and that's ok. But just know that this is "Fabulous Food for February" month and that I'll be focusing on eating better and more healthfully!

I also want all of my readers out there to know that on days when I don't feel like doing ANYTHING, your encouragement and words of wisdom spring forth in my mind and remind me that there are a lot of folks out there rooting for me, and it keeps me going! I love you all and treasure your support!

Onward we go!